A Tribute to Gloria, My Dear Friend
By Cherri Briggs
I met Gloria Steinem more than 30 years ago at her home in New York, but I first saw her speak at a conference in LA, where every guy in the room seemed to have a strong opinion about her. Most were intimidated, some seemed nervous and suspicious, only a few were initially 'fans’. Until she spoke... she was beautiful, open, funny, honest, and completely, absolutely authentically, herself. An hour into her talk, even her harshest critics seemed to have fallen half in love with her.
Over the years, we became close friends. I walked the streets of New York with her where people aged 18 to 85 would stop her. ‘Are you Gloria Steinem’!?, they would gasp, and she always spoke to them and deeply listened to everyone. Like many of her friends, I camped out in her loft bedroom above the dining table innumerable times and watched every episode of Law and Order with her. In the revolving door of her wonderful home, I met many illustrious world leaders, known and unknown, all of whom were changing the world. Through my company Explore we were able to help facilitate her efforts to get women out of war zones and brought to safety and raise funds for local initiatives in Africa for girls and women that continue to change lives. Some of these projects saved hundreds of lives when Africa virtually shut down during covid.
We connected in many ways, from our lonely nomadic childhoods to our deep appreciation of traditional cultures and Africa and its wild inhabitants. She was mad about elephants. In fact she was absolutely besotted with these gentle grey giants and could sit for hours and watch the families come through to the river as she and Richard and I sat on our deck alongside the Zambezi. I would send her pictures of elephants from all over Africa and she would always say, 'I have to get back there soon!'
We had many adventures together in Africa on safari and spent long days sitting on the ground in dusty villages with local women in a circle, brainstorming with them about how to move forward to better their harsh lives and break the cycle of poverty. Through Explore we planned her 80th birthday celebration and a ‘Pre-90th’ birthday safari when she came to see us last time in Zambia, along with some of her very special friends. Over the years we caused some “good trouble”, as she would call it, across the continent. We supported the San (bushmen) people in the Kalahari in their efforts to maintain their traditional lifestyle in Botswana and fought uranium mining on the banks of the Zambezi in Zambia. A couple of times we even won the battles. In Zambia she helped brainstorm our local initiative, DIA (Direct Impact Africa), while sitting under what became known by local women as the ‘magic tree’ where in a couple of hours she somehow showed a group of local women how to build trust between each other, come together, and share their needs and trials. This simple exercise has somehow proven to have imbued them with the power to address the abuse and powerlessness they were experiencing. I am sure this was the first 'sharing circle' in that remote part of Africa and changed the lives of many who are now empowered through the local cooperatives DIA has created over the years which provides them with the means to create economic self-sufficiency and thus the ability to make their own decisions.
A couple of years later, in her beautiful and increasingly famed living room, she helped my husband Richard and I write our marriage vows. A few months later we recited these vows in the Kalahari, and the local bushmen performed their trance dance as a blessing. We visited the San again just last week in Botswana, and the tradition lives on. I always think of Gloria when we are with the San.
Aside from all that she accomplished and represents, and the generations whose lives she helped change, past, present and future, she was the most loving, wise and generous human being I have known in my life. She also had an extraordinarily wicked sense of humor which made traveling with her a delight. Her generosity was boundless. She would choose the worst seat in the vehicle on a rough road so others would be comfortable. She would say she was not hungry when there weren't enough chocolate brownies to go around, despite the fact that she loved chocolate. I remember a time when we were having lunch in New York and she barely touched her food as it seemed everyone in the restaurant wanted to say hi and tell her how she had influenced their lives and thank her.
I asked her how she had the energy to give so much. She seemed surprised and said, “I get 10 times more back from them than they do from me!”
She is famed as the world's #1 feminist icon, which of course she is, and she believed deeply in equal rights for every one. She taught people, including men, that feminism means equality. Gloria was color blind and gender blind. She loved humanity, the natural world, and freedom beyond all. Her passing means there is one less bright light in the sky in a time when the world seems increasingly dark, but her message lives on in millions of us and is more important than ever. She remained 100% authentic and true to her cause throughout all her life, and would want each and everyone of us, regardless of creed, gender, color or heritage, to fight on in the support of life and freedom. The bushmen believe the night stars are the 'fires of the ancestors'. Look up! Her star shines on us all.